Things You Need to Know About the Bank

I work at a Bank and I've been there for a little over a year. I hate my job. Well, maybe not the job so much as some other aspects of it. Anyways, I've decided to compile a list of things you need to know about the bank. So, without further ado:

Things You Need to Know About the Bank

1. It is only necessary to push the "call teller" button once. Just because we don't answer immediately does not mean that we didn't hear you. Believe it or not, but there may be somebody else who needed our help that was there before you. Pushing the button three or four times in a row will not help your case either. In fact you will most definitely piss me off. If the bank was a fast food place, this is the point where your food would get spit into.

2. After I introduce myself, it is not necessary to explain to me that you are making a deposit, withdrawing, making a payment, or cashing a check. Most of the time, the transaction speaks for itself. If I have a question about it, I will ask you. I don't want to screw up your stuff as much as you don't want me to. That would require me to go back, reverse what I just did, and redo it. Generally then requiring me to fill out new slips for you.

3. Please don't make origami shapes from your slips, checks, and money. I am not amused by the number of times that you can fold paper. I am not amused at how small you folded that paper to fit inside that big tube. I am not amused that you managed to fold your transaction to fit perfectly around your ID.

4. Do NOT roll your eyes when I ask for your ID!! You should be grateful that I'm asking and not just giving YOUR money to random people. You also can't have the balance on an account that doesn't have your name on it. I can't tell you how overdrawn they are. Would you like me giving that information to other people who aren't on your account?

5. It's not my fault that you are overdrawn. Learn how to add and subtract. And keeping a check register is a great starting point too. Some guy told me that he only wrote one or two checks a month and he didn't understand how he was overdrawn. When I asked him if he kept a register, he told me no because he only writes one or two checks a month. I wanted to find the closest wall to bang my head into. Strike that - his head!!

6. The window lane is for business customers. Do you really think it's fair to make the people who should be there wait for your slow ass? You also should not come to the window if you aren't ready. I can send a slip through the tube the same way I can send it out the window.

7. Contrary to what you might think, I am a bright girl and a nice girl. Please recognize that.

All of your lives will be much better if you keep these simple tips in mind the next time you decide to take a trip to the bank.