Friday, September 16, 2011

Explaining Myself

I guess that I have some explaining to do, don't I?

I am 12w2d pregnant today, so just coming up on the end of the third month and the first trimester.  I've done a little lying around these parts.  When I posted about our WTF appointment with the RE, I said that we were going to move on when we were ready.  Well, truth is, I told the RE that I wanted to move on right away.  I asked him when we could pursue a frozen embryo transfer (FET) and he said that we could do it as soon as I was ready.  I told him that I was ready right away.  I didn't want to sit and dwell on what I had lost and the fact that I wasn't pregnant.  I told him that I was sick of playing the infertility game and that all I wanted was a successful pregnancy and to bring a baby home.  He said that we could start the process as soon as I started my cycle.  I began to bleed a few days after that.

The beauty about doing a FET cycle, is that you can basically decide when you want to do the transfer.  Well, we knew that we were hosting Wes' first birthday party, and that we were planning a trip to Florida, so we scheduled the transfer for the Monday after the party and we left for vacation that Thursday.  The timing worked out perfect.  After doing a transfer, the RE likes to have you on bed rest for 2 days.  So, we did the transfer and I was on bed rest for Monday and Tuesday, we spent Wednesday packing and getting ready to leave, and then we went and spent a long weekend relaxing on the beach.  It was perfect timing. 

We also kept this a secret from everyone.  The pressure that I felt last time was horrible.  Everybody knew when I had my beta and were chomping at the bit to know if I was pregnant or not.  Drew and I barely had time to process the news ourselves before we had to tell everybody else.  So this time?  We left everyone else out of the equation.  Much less stress!

When did we find out I was pregnant?  Well, that's a funny story.  Drew and I were in Florida on our vacation.  We flew out of the Rockford airport for this trip (Seriously, words can not describe how much I loved flying out of there.) and our flight wasn't until early Tuesday morning.  The friends we were in Florida with, dropped us off at the hotel we were staying at in Orlando on Monday afternoon.  So, Drew and I were there, without a car, for the night.  Fortunately, we were within walking distance of a Walmart, so I, quite literally, begged him to walk to Walmart to get a pregnancy test.  We picked up some dinner at Subway, and came back to the hotel room.  I went straight into the bathroom.  I wasn't even done peeing or wiping before the 2nd line appeared.  And it was DARK!!!  I squealed.  I jumped up and down.  I was elated!  And Drew couldn't wipe the smile from his face either. 

My first beta was on Wednesday, July 20 and it came back at 311!!!  If you remember my first beta the last time was 15, this one was way better!  I couldn't help but feel optimistic at this point, but I knew that the important thing was to have the number double by the next beta, which was Friday, July 22.  That one came back at 784!!!  I was officially pregnant!  My first ultrasound was scheduled for Wednesday, August 10 and I would be 7 weeks.

I was so nervous when that day arrived.  All I wanted was to see a healthy baby and to hear a heartbeat.  God heard my prayers because we saw one beautiful little blob with a heartbeat of 132bpm.  I cried.  There is no sweeter sound than hearing that heartbeat.  My next ultrasound was scheduled for 12 weeks.

I have been consistently going in for blood work to monitor my hormone levels.  After my blood work appointment at 10 weeks, the nurse could tell that I was nervous and anxious about the baby.  She scheduled me to come in the next day, on Wednesday, August 31, at exactly 10 weeks to check on the baby.

The picture from the ultrasound is the one that I posted to share our surprise.  Baby looked great and had a heartbeat of 184bpm. 

As for me, I've been feeling awful!  My first pregnancy symptom started at 4w5d with some very unpleasant diarrhea.  Everybody said it was normal.  Morning sickness started at 5w4d.  And it started with a vengeance.  I was horribly sick for about 2 weeks.  I barely ate and puked a lot.  After about 2 weeks, I started to get a grasp of it.  I could eat a little better, but I was still pretty touch and go.  Now?  I still have my good and bad days.  At this point, I eat what sounds good.  If it doesn't sound good, I don't force it.  I've learned my lesson about that.  I eat ALL.THE.TIME.  Seriously.  It's quite annoying.  Lately, I feel very sick if I let myself get even a little bit hungry.  So, if you see me somewhere, know that I most definitely have snacks with me. 

Other than the morning sickness, I feel kinda achy at times.  There are some mornings where my back and neck and shoulders are very sore when I wake, and other mornings where I feel pretty good.  I have starting having some pain in my ribs.  I notice it mainly when I first wake up and it seems to lessen as the day goes on.  I have also had a lot of round ligament pain.  That hasn't been pleasant.

I really don't have a bump or anything as of yet.  I'm a little bloated, but it's gone down in the past week or so.

So, that's the whole story.  I am so happy that it's out in the open and I can start blogging about everything.  I apologize for the lack of content around here lately.  I couldn't blog about the pregnancy and I really wasn't doing much else besides hanging around the house because of the morning sickness. 

1 comment:

Dana said...

I totally understand. We did not tell anyone until we had our first ultrasound to ensure that everything was alright. I am 19 weeks and am expanding quickly.