Wednesday's Word

Provender / PROV-uhn-duhr / noun
1. Dry food for domestic animals, such as hay, straw, corn, oats, or a mixture of ground grain; feed.
2. Food or provisions.

It turns out that he and thousands of other German immigrants have been acting as pre-invasion intelligence-gatherers, ensuring that "the German Army knew almost to a bale of hay what provender lay between London and the coast."
-- Niall Ferguson, The Pity of War

Frances Trollope, Captain Marryat, Colonel Basil Hall and Charles Dickens in 1842 all commented on the way Americans wolfed down their provender as fast as possible, cramming the cornbread in their sloppy maws and, worse, doing so in grim silence, punctuated only by noise of slurps, grunts; scraping knives and hacking coughs.
-- Simon Schama, "Them and US", The Guardian, March 29, 2003

No More Secrets

If you remember here, I told you that I had a lot going on, but I couldn't reveal anything just yet. Well, the time has come. I can spill the beans.

As you probably know, I've worked at a bank since July 2007. I have never really enjoyed my job there. I enjoyed the work, but I, in no way, enjoyed the sales aspect of it. Hated it actually! Guess what? I got a new job. I was offered the position in September and have just been working both jobs since they are both part time.

Drew and I have decided that we want to go to Georgia for Thanksgiving again this year. We went in 2007, but we weren't able to go last year because of the wedding. Once I found out that the new job gave us the day after Thanksgiving off, we decided that we simply couldn't miss it again this year.

I worked my last day at the bank yesterday. It's sad to leave, but good to move on. I was promised to go full time in December at the new job. But have recently found out that it may not happen until January now. But we knew that, right? Companies always make promises and very rarely follow through. Oh, what I wouldn't give to work for a company that actually said what they meant and meant what they said.

Wednesday's Word

Exegesis / ek-suh-JEE-sis / noun
plural exegeses / -seez /
Exposition; explanation; especially, a critical explanation of a text.

It is a fiercely argued exegesis of Shakespeare's plays in the tradition of Samuel Johnson, Hazlitt and A. C. Bradley, a study that is as passionate as it is erudite.
-- Michiko Kakutani, "Vast Shakespearean Drama With All People as Players", New York Times, October 27, 1998

These are tightly argued, crisp exercises in literary and cultural exegesis which make perfectly clear the brilliant patterns of language and oftentimes strained analogic thinking of the poets.
-- review of Made in America, by Lisa M. Steinman, in the Journal of Modern Literature

No variety of love is too trivial for exegesis. No aspect of love is so ridiculous that it hasn't been exhaustively reviewed by the great thinkers, the great artists, and the great hosts of daytime talk shows.
-- P. J. O'Rourke, Eat the Rich

Their works are the subject of innumerable analyses, exegeses, seminars, and doctoral theses.
-- Alan Sokal and Jean Bricmont, Fashionable Nonsense

Could It Really Be Over?

Last Thursday, November 5, Drew and I went back to the doctor for a follow up appointment after my surgery. I don't think that I had ever been so excited to go to the doctor. I never got the opportunity to talk to her after the surgery, so I was anxious to hear things from her and to be able to ask some of the questions that I had been having.

Dr. H showed me the pictures that she took during the surgery. Boy, were those interesting! I honestly had no idea what I was looking at, but she went through them and pointed out things to Drew and me. I basically just took her word for it. She showed me the spots where I have endometriosis. She said that I have Stage 4, which is the worse there is. She discussed with me everything that she told Drew and my mom after the surgery. We basically decided that doing continuous birth control to stop my periods would be the best decision for right now. She told me that I had to wait until the Sunday after my next period to start. Dr. H then said that I would probably have one more bad period then.

I am extremely happy to report that I am finishing up my cycle and I was not sick at all. Not even a little bit!!! This is such good news to me. That also means that I'll be taking my first birth control pill tonight.

I'm really nervous about it. The pharmacy tech said that I would probably be nauseous with it, so it would be best to take it at night so that I could sleep through it. I'm just praying that God lays his hand over and protects me. I don't want to feel sick anymore from all this stuff. I just want to feel better, normal.

I want to say a huge thank you to all of my family and friends who have called or written to see how I've been feeling. I can't express to you how much it has meant to me!

Wednesday's Word

Forfend / for-FEND / transitive verb
also forefend
1. a. (Archaic) To prohibit; to forbid.
b. To ward off; to prevent; to avert.
2. To defend; to protect; to preserve.

The Tory leader sort of wanted to say that the government should deploy the army more rapidly, but -- heaven forfend -- he didn't want to imply that it was anybody's fault that the soldiers hadn't been deployed!
-- Simon Hoggart, "A greasy whiff dispels the stench of worthiness", Guardian, March 22, 2001

If one of us is missing, heaven forfend, then the king's forces are diminished.
-- Leon Wieseltier, Kaddish

The river of discovery will continue to flow without cessation, deepening our understanding of the world and enhancing our capacity to forfend calamity and live congenial lives.
-- John Maddox, What Remains To Be Discovered

Wednesday's Word

Skulduggery / skul-DUG-uh-ree / noun
also skullduggery
Devious, dishonest, or unscrupulous behavior or activity; also: an instance thereof.

And then the inquests, and the coroner's reports, and the hints of diplomatic cover-ups, and skulduggery in high places.
-- Hilary Mantel, Eight Months on Ghazzah Street

Laptop theft was the third most common electonic skulduggery, behind viruses (84 percent) and unauthorized employee use of computers and software (78 percent), according to the survery by the Computer Security Institute in San Francisco.
-- Michael Cooper, "Low Tech Joins the Fights Against High-Tech Theft", New York Times, April 23, 1998

For instance, the Federal Trade Commission already goes after some kindsof Internet skulduggery, like selling products that promise more than they deliver.
-- David Stout, "New Internet Anti-Fraud Center Announced by Attorney General", New York Times, May 9, 2000

I'm Still Whole

I thought that I should probably recap surgery and let everyone know what happened.

We arrived at the hospital bright and early at 7 AM. We checked in and were given a pager. Drew and I sat and waited for about 10 minutes and then a nurse came and brought us back to hospital "cubicle". It was a 3 walled room with a curtain, a bed, and a bunch of machines. The nurse had me change into one of the stylish operating gowns and then we played the waiting game.
After about an hour, another nurse came in and hooked up my IV. It was my first time ever having an IV. Obviously, it was Drew's first time too!

After the IV got hooked up, I had to just lay around and wait. Before that, I was pacing and couldn't sit still. There must have been something in there to calm me down!

Surgery was scheduled to begin at 9 AM, but wouldn't you know it, they were running late. Dr. H came in to talk to us about what she was planning on doing. It was nothing new. Then, the anesthesiologist came and talked to me about what he would be doing. His name was Dr. Bone. I told Drew that I hoped he was hot with a name like that. He was older, which was ok by me. I'd much rather have a seasoned veteran knocking me out than some young buck fresh out of diapers.

A new nurse came to get me and wheel me back to the operating room. I was actually pretty calm. Again, there must have been something in that IV! She wheeled me into the room and introduced the other two nurses that were in there. I didn't have my contacts in or my glasses on at this point, so I was blind. I saw people, but I wouldn't be able to pick them out now. The nurse wheeled my bed up right next to the operating table and had me scoot over onto it. She untied my gown and it was absolutely freezing in there!!! She starting sticking heart monitors on me that didn't help my goosebumps. The anesthesiologist put a blood pressure cuff on and I remember telling them that I was sorry that I was shaking so bad and that I was cold and nervous. Dr. Bone said that it was ok because they weren't nervous at all. Good thing Doc! Dr. H came into the room then and I felt a poking in my IV. Dr. Bone then stated that I would be going to sleep. I looked up at the lights and remember thinking that I needed to be sure to keep my eyes open because I didn't want them to think that I was asleep but not really be asleep.

The next thing I remember was waking up and asking how long I had been asleep for. I told them that I felt like I had been dreaming. Then, I started coughing. I had a breathing tube during surgery and it made me feel like I had a frog in my throat. I kept coughing and clearing my throat. So annoying! I woke up in the recovery room and immediately asked for something to drink. The nurse that was attending me brought me ice chips and kept asking every two seconds if I was nauseous. I said no and open my mouth for more ice. I could not stop coughing. I asked for a drink, but that wasn't happening apparently. After being asked about 20 times if I was nauseous and proving that I was awake and coherent, I was wheeled to the post surgery "cubicle".

A new nurse was in there and asked if I was in pain. I actually wasn't too bad, but I knew better than to wait. I said yes, and she told me that she would be bringing me an oral pain med and asked what I wanted to drink. Um..... just wheel the entire pop machine in my room please! I asked for Sierra Mist and was told that I needed to eat some crackers with the pain meds. Graham crackers were my choice. Honestly... best graham crackers ever! (Keep in mind that it was the first solid food I had had since Saturday.) Once the new nurse had me checked in, she called for my mom and Drew to come back.

Drew and my mom waited in the waiting room during surgery. They have a screen in there that told me where I was the entire time during surgery. They could see what time surgery prep started, what time surgery started, what time surgery ended, and when I left recovery.

They came back, and then we just waited for me to get discharged. We probably spent an hour and a half to two hours waiting for me to get discharged. I actually felt pretty good. Until I sat up to get dressed. The doctor had to use air to puff up my abdomen during surgery. The air has no where to go after surgery, but rise. The minute I sat up, the air rose straight to my shoulder and almost brought me to tears. It hurt.so.bad. On the drive home, the air was in my ribs and I could hardly breathe. It was not fun.

Once home, I basically just laid around. I mean, what else was I going to do. And I laid around on Wednesday and Thursday too. Friday, I finally felt like I could stand up for an extended period of time without falling over, so I decided to take a shower. Best.shower.ever!! I felt like a whole new woman. I felt good yesterday too and had a good time handing out candy to the trick-or-treaters. We even went to Adam and Nicole's for their Halloween Party.

I have two incisions, one right under my belly button and one right on my pubic bone. Neither one are very pretty right now. I do still have all of my organs!

Dr. H talked to Drew and my mom after surgery and she said that my right ovary was stuck to some tissue and other organs, so she unstuck that. She said that that was probably contributing to my pain during my period. My left tube was filled with fluid, so she drained that. She said that she doesn't think that it will ever work. I do have a large amount of endometriosis and she cleaned up some of it. Dr. H said that I'm at high risk of a tubal pregnancy, so I will have to be monitored very closely if and when I become pregnant. That is still a little ways off for Drew and I.

I have two options at this point. First is to be put on a medicine that will basically put me into menopause. Dr. H does not recommend this option because I could only be on it for a short amount of time and it wears away at bone density. I'm already small, so that's not a good choice. The second is birth control that will stop my period. It always seems to come back to the birth control doesn't it? I don't want to choose that route, but if it's going to keep me healthy and painfree until Drew and I decided to try for a baby, then so be it. We have an appointment on Thursday with Dr. H where I'm sure we will be discussing things.